The Magic of Facing Up

The first rule of stress management is to come in out of the storm.  When we are near a state of panic we need to first, find a moment of calm.  Until we are able to think a bit clearly we can't do anything to change the situation.  But once we have put the negative thoughts, the worries and anxieties on a shelf or in a box it is amazingly easy to keep them there.  That is when the 'nagger' is a wonderful friend, whether we admit it or not. I have not been very active with my creative writing lately.  I have been more focused on survival and self-help writing.  But I have been feeling that I needed to confront that.  This morning during the "magical first hour"(the way I refer to the time when I am waking up but also aware of the creativity I want to focus on for the day) I did face up to how much I need to get back to my creative writing.  Then I had a couple of ideas about ways I can create time and space in my office or dining room to facilitate that desired writing.  The decision to allow myself to write the fun stuff seemed to give me a magical boost in many ways.  I had more energy for the functional writing and for other life tasks.  I realized this extra energy, this bit of magic had come when I had stopped and confronted the bit of dis-ease I had been feeling from 'ignoring the song my soul wanted to sing'.
So I suggest to all wise magicians that you too, may find a bit of extra life energy by confronting little stressors in your life.  When you face up, you are given the way to solve the problem.  Whether it be in your creative life, becoming more productive in other ways, or in relationships, if you face up to the need for change you will be given the way to make things better for yourself.  Reach out to the magic that surrounds you for help and face up to something.  It will work magic in your life.  May the spark be with you.

The Magic of 'What?'

It is very useful to pause every once in a while and use the magic of 'what'.  As in "What is going on here?","What is this person really trying to say?", "What am I thinking or feeling?", "What can I do about this?",
"What are people trying to get me to do?".  If you do this from time to time you may be amazed.  Politicians put out slogans that don't actually mean anything but their followers blindly accept them as sacred truth.  Sometimes even a wise magician may be buying into a slogan or bit of dogma, but if they ask what is beneath it they may find ways to grow in understanding.  In personal communication it is important, also, to wonder ' what is going on?'.  Anger may seem to be what is being expressed but the speaker actually is feeling afraid and vulnerable. In the public realm people don't always vote for their self-interest, it seems.  But they feel a need to lean on their authorities so they don't question.  They vote as they are told.  It is hard for people to balance their sense of self as an individual with their sense of self as a member of a group.  Only by asking 'what?' can a person identify their values and learn to move towards a satisfying life. People are as happy as they choose to be, but they don't always realize what choices they are making.  I suggest to all wise magicians that you get to a safe and comfortable place and play with the magic of 'what'.  You may be delighted with what you discover.  May the spark be with you.

The Magic of Lighting a Candle

When you light a candle you are making a strong action.  You are also making a magical action.  Remember that magic is the act of bringing more goodness into your life.  A candle invokes the energy of fire, with the warmth and light of fire, but without the destructive aspect.  However, you can also light a candle to remind yourself of the way fire cleanses and brings forth new beginnings.  Many times we get caught up in a life of habitual actions, of just passively going through motions.  We must combat the ennui that can result with a decisive act.  A symbolic way to declare that we are going to be more active in shaping our own destiny is to light a candle.  A candle can shine in dark places.  A candle can be a beacon of hope in dark times.  A candle can remind us to draw on the energy of the magic that surrounds us.  A candle can be lit to dispel fear.  A candle's light can be shared with other people. I suggest to all wise magicians that you look at your life and see if it would be good to boldly light a candle for yourself and the world.  You can stand up for your own truth.  You can be warmed by the gentle warmth of a candle's flame.  If you have been living in the shadows you can bring yourself into a better place by this simple action.  Light a candle and you will find it easier to do other things to bring goodness into your life.  May the spark be with you.

The Magic of Reflection

In many fairy tales a mirror or a still pond are important to the story.  The reflection seen gives a magical truth.  Since metaphors about magic have a lot of wisdom for all wise magicians I would like to explore the ideas of reflection.  First of all, when we reflect on something we gain a deeper understanding of it.  That certainly will bring better things into our life.  If a loved one snaps at us we may be able to understand what is stressing them if we reflect on the incident.  Then we can strengthen the relationship by helping to relieve their stress.  There are myriad times when it is wise to reflect on news stories, comments in the media, even advertisements.  When we process the information we gain from that reflection we can make a more logical decision about what we have heard or read.  Another aspect of reflection as mentioned in fairy tales is that when a mirror reflects something it turns it around.  We can get some powerful insights when we think about things from different perspectives.  Look at something from the other side, backwards, upside down.  Critical thinking is an important skill that too few people develop in themselves. Clear, problem solving thinking is an important habit of mind to develop.  Creative thinking is not the opposite of critical thinking.  The creative thinker wants to solve a problem.  But intuition may well come into play in creative thinking. It is a good idea to take the time to process our ideas and what we take in regarding the ideas of others.  Lies and superstition can't take hold of the mind of a person who bothers to reflect.  Reflection is also used in another way.  A shiny object reflects back the light that hits it.  As wise magicians we can reflect the light of wisdom, integrity, courage, kindness and happiness.  Or any other virtue we want to send back into the world.  Take the time to reflect.  It will bring magic into your life.  May the spark be with you.

The Magic of a Step Back

Sometimes we are in the middle of a problem, or a situation, and things just aren't working the way they should.  It is time to take a step back.  This step back may be a breather, a chance to collect our breath, get new energy and be ready to go again.  Or it may be a way to get a new perspective on things. It may be that it is time to try something else.  In the 1950's the mathematician George Polya published a book that has become a classic, "How To Solve It".  It is good advice for life as well as for mathematics.  In it he suggests that when a problem seems too hard  you step back and solve a similar problem that you can solve.  This often teaches you what you need to know to go back to the original difficult problem.  Taking a step back not only helps when you are facing difficulties, it also adds to life in another way.  If you are busy getting things done you may be failing to 'stop and smell the roses'.  From time to time it is essential to step back and appreciate what a fine craftsman you are at life.  Or step back and appreciate the people around you.  Another way that taking a step back is when you really need to put out a lot of effort on something.  Step back, gather your forces, be well prepared and get a good running start.  Stepping back is not giving up or running away.  Rather it is a way to gather the magic that will help you succeed and have a more magical life.  So, I suggest to all wise magicians, at times it is well to step back so that you can better go forward.  May the spark be with you.

The Magic of Musing

Sometimes I feel the need for magic and am not sure how to draw it to me. At times like that I use the magic wand of musing. I did that this morning and received a wonderful magical insight. I was feeling kind of down myself but was also dwelling on someone in my family who doesn't seem to feel that successful in life. I was musing on whether of not he was having his life needs met. I have often watched videos of Tony Robbins help people find ways to meet their basic human needs. One of those needs is significance. The thought occurred to me that I myself, as well as my family member, might not be feeling significant enough. Then the magic that surrounds me tapped me along side the head and said: "It's just like the shift from-'It's not how smart you are but how you are smart'- change it from 'How significant you are' to 'How you are significant'. That gave me a great feeling of magic in my life. I am significant. I can now discover the ways I am significant, the ways I matter. I hope I can find a way to help others also make this paradigm shift. We don't have to be a rock star to hear our soul sing. I suggest that all wise magicians celebrate their significance today in what ever way their soul wishes. May the spark be with you.

Where Magic Resides

Recently I had that recurring feeling of a need for a bit of zing in my life, for a connection with magic. That evening I went to a meeting of Colorado Dramatists,a critique group of playwrights. The member who needed a critique was in Austin, Texas but needed to get feedback for a couple of short plays he had been requested to write for a theater in London, England. We set up our session so the author could interact with us over speaker phone. We did a reading of his plays then discussed our suggestions with him. During this time and during the visiting among ourselves later, discussing past enterprises of Colorado Dramatists, I realized the room was full of magic. There were eight of us, if you counted the member in Austin, who were all highly creative and happy to be so. Different things each of us had to deal with were mentioned and suggestions or appreciations were given. But even when problems were discussed the sense of 'life is good' was there. Since then I have had several other times where I have had the same experience: that life is interesting and worthwhile and even fun, no matter what. Being around others and sharing experiences with them enriches my own sense of being in an energy field of magic. Humans are social beings. Not only do we need people to survive but also to thrive. A sense of joy and well being is more apt to develop if we spend time among friends. So I do hope that all the wise magicians who read this will let social connections help bring magic to life. May the spark be with you.

The Magic Of Generosity

The author Vicki Hitzges says that when we do good it boomerangs back to us for our benefit. That is a big part of the idea of Karma as well. Even if we don't notice direct and quick benefits from doing good to others we do benefit from it in the increased self esteem and satisfaction from knowing we have reached out in a good way. Claim your abundance and share it with others.
You may be wondering how ideas about magic and karma can be connected. Both paradigms are built on the ideas of being connected in greater ways than we can see and that actions have an effect.
You may also wonder how you can work magic through generosity. You must be careful here. Doing good only to get good could possibly backfire on you. Insincerity gets found out. But if you will put trust in the energy of the magic that surrounds you you will benefit. Think about the way Disney movies, and others, show a magician casting a spell. It is a very exuberant motion outwards. Nothing is constricted or held back. Do your giving in the same way. Cast your generosity out into the world. Stephen Post, Director of The Center for Medical Humanities......(long name) says "Happiness is a byproduct of living generously.". So I suggest to all wise magicians that if you give small appreciations of others often, that if you respond to need without worrying about your ego, that if you do not enable but empower, your life will take on dimensions of joy and glory that it may not have had before. Often when you help others they look for ways to help you in return and both benefit. If you already live generously give yourself the awareness of all the good that is already in your life. Be generously grateful. May the spark be with you.

The Shoemakers Magic

The shoemaker was a poor struggling workman who became very rich. Read the story of "The Shoemaker and the Elves" and learn valuable lessons from that. The shoemaker was struggling. But he had a good product that had a demand, and he could be trusted. Some outside help came his way. In terms in use in the present it could be said that he caught the eye of some venture capitalists. Anyway, he got some outside help. Then he carefully took advantage of that help and plowed all his profits back into his business until it because very profitable. Many people throw away their resources and their windfalls then bemoan their situation. That is not taking advantage of the magic that surround you. The shoemaker was totally responsible in all aspects of his craft, including the marketing, letting potential clients know he had a good product. I believe a wise magician would constantly look for resources and ways to develop those resources until he had a good product. Then he would find a magical, appealing way to market that product and use that way. Many times the product people have is themselves. It does not do to tear down or degrade that product that is yourself. Opportunities abound even though they may not be handed out on a silver platter. Have faith and be creative. You may be surprised at the financial opportunities that will come your way, almost like magic. The friends you make, who trust you, will be part of that magic, trying to advise and help you. May the spark be with you.

Creating Magic

At times we may think that magic is only connected to the "need" for change, to help in times of stress or trouble. But we can have a mind set of creating magic that will prevent some stress and make our lives more enjoyable. My oldest daughter has a way of adding a touch of beauty or fun wherever she is. A wind chime in the garden, a tee shirt that matches the cup she is using for tea, a wreathe on the front door. She seems to do this automatically throughout the day. My second daughter does the same thing with ideas, always looking for ways to make the teaching she does as a physical therapist easier for her patients, or finding cute names for friends. It gave me a laugh to be called 'Momma Doodles' on my birthday. If you have a mind set that you can make the small changes for fun, beauty, efficiency and so on, it will lead to you being more able and willing to take on the bigger changes that you may face. The important thing is that you, as a wise magician, are an agent of change. A little touch here, a little touch there and soon your magic kingdom will start to appear. Give yourself and others the gift of enjoyment and comfort and it will energize you for living a fuller life. May the spark be with you.

Advanced Magic Wanding

This is the story of the week I just spent in the hospital. I spent my 70th birthday hooked up to oxygen and other tubes, hoping to get my dangerously high heart rate down. I felt like the doctors at Denver Health understood a few things about magic. I think the wise magician knows we are not alone and the resources of our culture and society are there for us. A great tool for good change is the resources of our society. After a week of getting back on the track to health another little piece of magic manifested. It took so long to discharge me that my designated ride was no longer available. But another friend found out I needed a ride and appeared. She called the hospital and told them she was on her way. Much better and friendlier than the cab they were arranging for me to get me to the clinic where I had left my car. So I suggest to those of you who wish to wield the magic wand at the highest level that you keep yourself open to help from every direction possible. Surround yourself with good people. That helps you in myriad ways. Your magic wand is any tool you choose to use, including your own inner resources. Whether you need to change your life style or your environment, change is possible. Reach out to the energy of the magic that surrounds and take on the quest for change. May the spark be with you.

A Magical Phrase

There are many magical phrases. They all can cast a spell over us and help us become more than we were before they were uttered. One that I think is particularly appropriate now that we are coming into the beginning of a new year is: "What if...?" Relax in whatever manner is good for you. Breathe in deeply. Breathe out in a wondrous freeing way. Now begin to explore the ideas of 'what if'. What if situations that have been irritating you could be changed? What if you have more resources inside yourself than you have yet realized? What if you are surprised in wonderful ways tomorrow or this coming week? What if you are meant to understand something more fully than you have before? What if your sense of beauty, humor, joy, contentment kicks in more often than it used to? What if you suddenly come to appreciate family and friends on a deeper level? What if you are a wiser magician than you realized before? What if there are unlimited possibilities for change for the better? As you explore the ideas of 'what if' it is good to let any visualization come that wants to come to you. Let your senses help you enjoy the idea of 'what if..?' Let your sense of wonder help you explore the idea of 'what if..?' This phrase can become one of your magic wands. When you get into the right mind set it can open up your creativity for many wonderful ideas. So enjoy the idea of possibilities it opens up and enjoy the practical way it can help you decide what changes you need to make in your magical life. May the spark be with you.

The Use Of Power

Magic is very concerned with the use of power. Magicians are taught to guard their wands carefully so someone else can not steal it and use the power of it against them. In that context the wise magicians know not to give their power away. Yet in everyday life it is all too easy to give our power away without realizing it. We give up our ability to decide for ourselves in food, fashion, fads, and politics more often than we will admit. We can regain that with a little thought however. But the power we give away that I caution against is the power of self-esteem or image. We can get our feelings hurt, our souls wounded, by valuing what another person says to or about us if we have given them power over us. This is natural in a way. A child learns his self image from his care givers. But we must develop our own image of ourselves and accept ourselves. If you feel pulled down by judgments from others or by yourself notice that. Being pulled down is the operative idea here. I have actions I am trying to eradicate from my bundle of habits. But that is my choice and I don't need the extra burden of being pulled down as I notice them and work to change. If you have phrases in your vocabulary like: "She made me so angry." or "He hurt me so much." instead of "I became angry at what she said" or "I felt hurt at what he did." you are in danger of giving others power over you. Your feelings are your own, as well as your reactions, and you do choose them. Many people don't believe this but I might suggest an experiment to try. Find someone who speaks a language you do not. Ask them to say a loving thing and an insulting thing to you without any facial expression and without telling you which is which. Because you perceive the words as only sounds you will not react to them with joy or hurt. When someone is lashing out at you it is possible to tell yourself they are simply making sounds. We all have much more power than we realize. Not only should we not give it away, we should also look to use it wisely. We have the power to influence, to encourage, to educate, to persuade, and to witness. Those are powers that can change the world. Guard your power and use it wisely. It is magical. May the spark be with you.

Magic Basics-Casting Spells

As you read in the lore of magic you realize that spells are endowed with ritual and ceremony. They are framed and performed in such a way that they seem to have a lot of power and importance. They are not cast lightly. Think about this in relationship to the power your subconscious has. If you want to impress on it changes and get it to help you create your new life a well crafted spell will be just the thing. Your subconscious perceives things differently than your left brain does. The workings of the subconscious are not easily evident, they are hidden or occult. Magic is called the study of the occult. To craft a spell state the desired change in as lyrical, clear and happy way as you can. Bring in any sensory messages you can. Here is one I might use: "I am writing, I am writing large on the canvas of life, clothing my message, my vision, my values in all the joy, fun, and excitement that I can bring forth. I am writing for the hearts and eyes of my precious readers, whoever and wherever they may be. It is so.' Spells are clear, assertive and reach out into the universe for you, as well as getting your inner self to help you. Let the energy of the magic that surrounds you help you to craft some spells for yourself. Once you have cast them it will be easier to stand behind them and work to bring them into being. Cast spells for positive changes in your life. If you have negative things in your life do not react with negativity. Craft the spell so that you stay positive. Here is a possible example. 'I recognize that I have lessons to learn in this situation. I proclaim that I will become clear about all and I will move toward self nurturing behavior in this situation. If I need to negotiate I will do so. If I need to break ties I will do so. I recognize the right of all for respect, especially myself and my soul. It is so.' May you be able to cast good spells for yourself. May the spark be with you.

The Magic That Is Around You

I often refer to the magic that is around you. Thinking of yourself as being surrounded by a nurturing field of great possibilities is part of the mind set of being a wise magician. This mind set does a great deal to keep you open to luck, great ideas and making good connections. Anti-magic is closed, helpless, hopeless, negative, unhealthy and dangerous. This idea of thinking you have a field of magic around you encourages you to make reality checks, to avoid closed loop thinking, to keep good goals in mind and to accept the good when it comes to you. Knowing that not every one can hook into the magic that is around you helps you recognize their baloney (or worse) when they throw it at you. There are concepts that people have developed over the centuries that show many cultures also accept that there is more than 'just us'. Some of these concepts are, karma, dharma, feng shui, synergy, synchronicity, synchrodestinity,the soul,love, luck, guardian angels, and providence. For centuries humans have recognized that life can be very difficult. Yet more often than not it seems to work out. I used to have a very dour 'baloney-tosser' in my life. He hated psychology because he said it wasn't a science. That was his surface excuse to avoid maturing. I didn't discuss it with him but I do know in my graduate courses in the history of science and intellectual thought that researchers often accepted a concept as 'useful' even if they weren't sure that it was a final concept. Magic is meant to be useful. It is well formed and practical. The purpose is to help you, the wise magician, shape a good life for yourself and others. So reach out to the energy of the magic that surrounds you and find a way to have some joy, some luck, some goodness in your life. May the spark be with you.

The Magic Of Staging

Last evening I was watching the old movie, "Bedknobs and Broomsticks" with Angela Lansbury. In the movie she comments on a spell as being a bit theatrical then goes on to say that all the best spells are. That is true. Magic is appealing. It is also very useful and important but if it doesn't appeal it is less likely to work. The universe knows about appeal. Flowers have smell and color. Women strive to be glamorous. People tell jokes to make people laugh and thus feel good. HGTV has programs about preparing or 'staging' a room to make a house appeal to buyers. The Food Network shows a chef arranging a plate in an attractive way. When you state your plans or desires it is well to do so in a way that sounds good as well as being to the point. Important events in a person's life are often staged in wonderful ways. Think of weddings, confirmations, graduations and so on. The extra bit of time and trouble that it takes to stage a spell, appearance or event makes it stay in memory better and helps to underscore its importance. A wise magician will take this into account. Dressing well for work sends out the message that work is important to you. Having an attractive home sends the message that the residents and guest of that home are important. When you add the little extra bit of flair or polish to anything you are taking a bit of energy from the magic that surrounds you to make that thing better. Look around you. What can you stage in a better way in your life? You may be surprised and delighted at the benefits staging can bring to you. Don't be afraid to try it. Do only what is right for you. Remember "magic is well formed." But do try staging your life in better ways. May the spark be with you.

When The Magic Is Weak

Sometimes it will be difficult to feel that you are connected to your magic. You will recognize this by loss of interest in doing your fun projects and not feeling much pressure to do the less fun but "should" projects either. You may find yourself up against malfunctions of technology that is not your fault. Then you can only try to find ways to alert the people that can fix things to do as they should. You can do no more. All sorts of things might happen. When you feel that your magic has weakened it is important to open the channels so that when it is strong again you will know it. The best ways to open up to magic is through your senses and through your connections to people. Do a variety of things that eventually will make the corners of your mouth feel happy and your eyes start to open. If there is a pet or child or other beloved in your life, even if not in your home, do what you can to get some physical contact. Also turn to your senses for your connection to magic. Smell something good. Look at trees and plants. At this time of year even the withering that is starting to happen is interesting as well as the change in colors. Explore variations of lighting. Candles, sunlight, shade, clouds are all of interest in strengthening your connection to the magic that surrounds you. I have mentioned before techniques you can use to energize yourself. These can be used to connect you to the feeling that magic abounds. Some of these are: a strong exhalation, a quick look upwards, rhythmic movement, stretching, saying mantras such as "well being" or "magic abounds" can also help. Another point about connecting to your magic is to clear away the events or things that are blocking you. Perhaps you need to grieve over something you did not think was that important to you. Perhaps you are in a low grade toxic situation and didn't know it was that bad so you were not moving away from it. Perhaps you are hungry, thirsty or need a nap. Perhaps you have been caught up in 'busyness'. Do what you can to become aware of those blocks and clear them away. The purpose of being connected to your magic is to feel at home in the world. Magic wants your well being. So when you first feel that it might be weak, act to strengthen it.
The magic that surrounds you will reach back to help that connection. May the spark be with you.

The Importance Of The Listener

Having a good listener in you life can work magic for you. You will understand yourself and your dreams and aspirations better. You will become more accepting of yourself. When you are validated by a good listener you have more energy to live your best life. So if you don't have a listener do what you can to bring one into your life. If you do have a listener do all you can to show them gratitude, respect and honor. Important to the communication process is making sure that what you say is understood in the same way by the listener. A good listener will ask you to clarify or explain. A good listener will do part of the work of getting your ideas across. Good listeners are not plentiful. But you still do need to show respect to any listener. The meaning of a message is in how it is received. This is a radical idea to some. They think that what they say is holy no matter what the other person perceives. But in reality it is silly to speak unless you do want to be understood. You would not speak French to a Greek who did not understand French, would you? Try to find words that will be understood the way you want them to be understood when you speak. Friendships and love relationships are built on being able to understand each other. The friend or lover becomes a good listener, each for the other. This doesn't happen overnight. The wise magician works to make sure her spells have a chance to work. She chooses her words with care because those words go outward and inward. That's why it isn't always a good idea to speak when you are angry, other than to communicate that you are angry. Reach out to the magic that surrounds you to find the strength and energy to find a good listener for yourself. It is also a good idea to become a good listener to yourself. May the spark be with you.

The Magic Of The Warm-up

You may already have a good idea of what a warm-up is but I'd like to focus on it for a bit just to help you really understand the magic in it. Athletes have warm- up activities to make sure their muscles have the proper blood flow and that the body-mind connections for their sport are functioning well. It is the same with musicians, vocal and instrumental. Perhaps you have answered the phone in the morning and been surprised by your voice having a catch in it or being gravelly. You hadn't yet spoken and your voice wasn't warmed-up. Warm-ups are useful or even necessary for the proper execution of the planned task or activity. Besides the importance of physical warm-up there is also brain and character warm-up. If you are going to engage in a mental activity that requires a lot of logic or sequential thinking you can first make up some lists or run through the times tables in your mind. Get your left brain in gear. The same is true when you are about to engage in creative work. Do a bit of imagining or appreciation of aesthetics to get your right brain working. When you are trying to make changes that involve strength of character or will power you will need both sides of your brain because they both work in helping your will power. I see myself as needing to warm up this way daily. I want to be a much published writer but I have trouble disciplining myself to work at my writing enough. Just focusing on the idea that you are going to use your will power in a certain situation will warm-up your strength of character. Or as has been said poetically, "screw your courage to the sticking point." If you are abusing food or any other substance you will not be caught off guard by temptation if you have set your mind to resist it. That is the result of warming-up your character. Schedules and good routines also help with that. As you start any endeavor you will become more fully involved in it and do a better job as you warm-up to it. Reach out to the magic that surrounds you for the energy to do a good warm-up and make your life better. May the spark be with you.

The Magic Of Daring Your Shoulds

"Shoulds" can be bullies. Things should be this way or that. People should do this or that. You will be much more in control of your life if you play 'dare base' with your "shoulds." That is the children's game in which you run towards the base of the other team, daring them to come out and get you. Ultimately that team is so busy daring your base they don't guard it well and you can take over their base. If you cower in the safety of your own base you have no chance of winning. You have to get out there and engage the other side. It is the same with rigid ideas. Question your "shoulds". It is easy to be enslaved by your ideas. People have been burned at the stake because others thought they should act and speak a certain way. (Also, it was done to get the wealth of the victims-if they were guilty of witchcraft or such their money was forfeit.) When people are debating certain political ideas anger based on incomplete understanding and communication often colors the situation. Violence may erupt. I know I have said that anger is your friend, alerting you to awareness of a change that needs to be made. When you are thinking about the change that needs to be made don't go for a negative, cruel poorly formed change. There are an awful lot of things in life that will not hurt you as much as you may want to think they will. Terrorists and bigots are busy hurting people, full of righteous anger about the way things "should" be. Judgmental attitudes rip at the field of magic that surrounds us all. In order to hook into that helpful energy it is good to question your "shoulds" when they come at you, daring you to be stupid, to lose your balance and control. Let your life be well balanced and good. May the spark be with you.