My magic castle

My magic castle

Friday, January 15, 2010

How Magic Sparks

If you are open to it, you can see sparks of magic often. It's in the whir of a humming bird's wing when it rushes across your head, in the patterns of bare branches against the sunrise, in a fussy baby suddenly looking into your eyes and smiling. I found a spark of magic yesterday when I was reeling from an observation of anger. I was wondering why I have kept this certain woman in my life for over twenty-five years. As I was musing on that I was playing computer solitaire. Often I click off before the cards have fully danced out after I win, or feel a sense of irritation as I wait to see if the green will be completely covered, sure that it will not. But this time I was letting the cards splash out and I had a shift, I got in the now and it was fun to see the cards dance, without any sense of judgment. Then I thought back to the senseless display of anger I had seen and wondered again about the cause of her anger. I realized that she feels judged and therefore judges others. But she does try to step up to the judging bar, and often passes muster pretty well. Yesterday I was pretty proud of myself for finding a possible venue for one of my plays. My shadow must be calling to me to put myself out there to be judged. I have been kind of a drop out in that respect. Perhaps I call to her to be mellow and she calls to me to toe the line. I got a laugh of discovery about the thought, at least.

No comments:

Post a Comment